In terms of men:
Burger: A man who dresses in latest, flamboyant, fashions in an attempt to look like a rockstar but ends up looking like a wierdo. Talks in english, drives a daddy gifted vehicle and hangs out with groups of males who share his thaughts and cosiders them a band or gang but have never been in an altercation in his life. Commonly known in the "awami" as a "wannabe" this kind of male is the one you normally find purchasing female colours (pink, red with flowers, yellow etc) for his "eastern" attire. He hangs out at the high end eating joints and fast food outlets and considers all other places a health hazard (mamas boy). He uses his car to get even the shortest of distance and the only time he sees the inside of a mosque is oneid when someone forced him to go
Bun Kabab: A scruffy, jeans t shirt wearing, tea drinking, cigarette smoking, dal chawal eating, dude who will have no qualms with wherever he hangs out and whatever he eats as long as he enjyos the company he's with (be it of the fairer sex) dude who uses phrases like "abbay yaar" , "oye", "dhakkan", "topi", "kia set bachi hai yaar!" etc. Most probably does not shave for days on end and has no problem referring to himself as a "maila"
In terms of women:
Burger: A fashionable woman who speks perpetually in "minglish" uses words like "acually" and "like" more than they need to be. She like to spend her free time at any location with a shop in it whether just to browse or shop. He bargains over things she does not intend to buy, and buys things she doe not need just because they are on sale. She does not miss out on a chance to admire her reflection in the mirror and is constantly talking about how fat she is getting but knows the she is not. She is extraordinarily demanding of all men, be it fiance's, husbands, brothers, fathers and random retailers and makes unreasonable requests like Agha's fresh juice when on the way to the airport and gets mad when the request is denied. Her makeup kit consits of items that i am not qualified to comprehend, and gets fussy about her wardrobe because "fine" is apparently not good enough and thye ENORMOUS wardrobe never seems to contain anything wearable. She normally dresses in exquisitely feminine colours and no matter what seems to end up looking fabulous.
Bun Kabab: Never seen one, never heard of one, not even sure they exist!
Wednesday, June 9, 2010
Tuesday, June 1, 2010
Life Sucks... So What Else Is New?
Have you ever read Murphy's Law? It clearly states, if anything just cannot go wrong, it will anyway!
In my belief this sentence puts this entire universe into perspective. Think about it for a little bit. Whenever you go to a market to buy an commodity item, whether it is a gold ring for the love of your life, steel for the house you've always wanted to build even if you are just in the mood to eat some chicken... how many times have you heard the sentence "Bhai, mandi charhee huee hai!" (the prices are high).
Does the "Mandi" come down at any time? The answer is yes. The "Mandi" will only come down when you are going to sell something that cost you a bomb. This is Murphy's Law in effect.
How can we forget mishaps on the road, not just accidents, have you ever noticed that roads get closed due to VIP movement only when you are in danger of missing you flight. How many times has your car shut down right in the centre of the road during rush hour, you try your level best to start it, to no avail, you push it to the side with no help from any of the morons staring at you in their mirrors as if you have committed a grave injustice to them just by being born. Now that you are late getting to where ever you were going, you call a mechanic, he charges a bomb just for showing up two hours later, asks you what the problem is, you define the entire story of how it shut down. He turns the key and voila! She starts! Now you get to pay the mechanic.
How many times have you had an embarrassing fall when everyone was watching? How many times have you had a picture taken with a goofy expression on your face? How many times have you lost something you needed urgently to find it in the most obvious location when the need is gone?
The point being, Murphy's Law is more applicable than the law of gravity and here's an insight, there is no way around it. Many of the optimists (read:denialists) would argue that you should prepare for all these eventualities and you would be right in thinking so... we should. But Mr. Murphy found a snag in that theory too: If you perceive that there are four possible ways in which something can go wrong, and circumvent these, then a fifth way, unprepared for, will promptly develop.
That's right children! It's law number one all over again.
People call me a pessimist and call it a cliche when I tell them I'm just being real. If the universe is not actively trying to kill us in elaborate an new ways, how do you explain the state of the world. I'm not just talking of people killing each other, do you know how many people die due to lightening strikes?
It has been this bad since time began. So in conclusion: Accept the truth, the universe will always find a way to fuck you. There is no escaping it, just lube up and bend over.
In my belief this sentence puts this entire universe into perspective. Think about it for a little bit. Whenever you go to a market to buy an commodity item, whether it is a gold ring for the love of your life, steel for the house you've always wanted to build even if you are just in the mood to eat some chicken... how many times have you heard the sentence "Bhai, mandi charhee huee hai!" (the prices are high).
Does the "Mandi" come down at any time? The answer is yes. The "Mandi" will only come down when you are going to sell something that cost you a bomb. This is Murphy's Law in effect.
How can we forget mishaps on the road, not just accidents, have you ever noticed that roads get closed due to VIP movement only when you are in danger of missing you flight. How many times has your car shut down right in the centre of the road during rush hour, you try your level best to start it, to no avail, you push it to the side with no help from any of the morons staring at you in their mirrors as if you have committed a grave injustice to them just by being born. Now that you are late getting to where ever you were going, you call a mechanic, he charges a bomb just for showing up two hours later, asks you what the problem is, you define the entire story of how it shut down. He turns the key and voila! She starts! Now you get to pay the mechanic.
How many times have you had an embarrassing fall when everyone was watching? How many times have you had a picture taken with a goofy expression on your face? How many times have you lost something you needed urgently to find it in the most obvious location when the need is gone?
The point being, Murphy's Law is more applicable than the law of gravity and here's an insight, there is no way around it. Many of the optimists (read:denialists) would argue that you should prepare for all these eventualities and you would be right in thinking so... we should. But Mr. Murphy found a snag in that theory too: If you perceive that there are four possible ways in which something can go wrong, and circumvent these, then a fifth way, unprepared for, will promptly develop.
That's right children! It's law number one all over again.
People call me a pessimist and call it a cliche when I tell them I'm just being real. If the universe is not actively trying to kill us in elaborate an new ways, how do you explain the state of the world. I'm not just talking of people killing each other, do you know how many people die due to lightening strikes?
It has been this bad since time began. So in conclusion: Accept the truth, the universe will always find a way to fuck you. There is no escaping it, just lube up and bend over.
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