Words I Take Issue With

There are certain words that have become part of regular vocabulary due to social media. I have some issues with some of these words which are listed as below.

Haters: 

Urban Dictionary defines haters as "A person that simply cannot be happy for another person's success. So rather than be happy they make a point of exposing a flaw in that person". Correct me if I'm wrong but isn't that the definition of a classical asshole? Why not just call them assholes... it seems a way more satisfying word.

Nerd:

I don't have an issue with the word nerd per se but more with the people referring to themselves as nerds. Most people referring to themselves as nerds have no interest in math, science or literature but have just watched a season of 'Game of Thrones' or the 'Avengers' moves. I have friends who do have an interest in math, science and literature and have religiously read books and comic books, and most of the modern day 'nerds' think of these people as losers... I don't understand how that happened.

SWAG:

What does that even mean. Like, seriously, what qualifies as swag? Do I have swag if I wear a bitchin suit or do i need to wear over sized clothes and make gang signs? What on earth is swag?

Twerking:

Urban Dictionary defines it as "when a girls' ass moves like a bowl of Jell-O". I know it was made famous by Miley Cyrus (I may be wrong), but then why are there vines of men doing it? Didn't the great philosophers of the previous decade refer to this act as the 'Booty Shakin'? 

YOLO:

It stands for 'You Only Live Once', which is in interesting acronym but every time I search for YOLO on the YouTube there are videos of high pitched teenage voices screaming the term before doing something that gets them hurt or arrested. They don't even do the cool kind of stuff like skateboard tricks or bike jumps, they usually do something really stupid like jump off a roof onto a tennis ball. Do all YOLO-ers have some sort of brain damage that impairs their ability to predict pain or an impending criminal record?

Emo:

I searched the internet for a definition of the word I read a lot on buzz feed but I cant find a definition that I can comprehend, mostly has something to do with 'punk' music which is not exactly 'punk'. Google images show me pictures of attractive women with blue hair. Is 'emo' a lifestyle? a fashion sense? a kind of music? an animal? an animal? It does seem whatever an 'emo' is, it is overly emotional to the point of being a pussy... the adjective not the noun... 

Beliebers:

What an unfortunate thing to admit in public, like syphilis.

Hipsters:

Here's how I define hipsters, a large group of people who reject brands, people and ideologies by referring to them as mainstream. They all dress alike, use the same phone, wear the same glasses and generally look no different from the hipster next to them. I see a bit of an oxymoron there because hipsters are now mainstream... it's more of a fashion sense, just like the military machine of the world has a fashion sense and rejects ideologies. My issue is this, either be different or accept you are the same, or is that too mainstream for you.

I thank you for your time and patience and do let me know if there is a word that you find annoying or don't see the point of.

Regards,

Z

Please don't label me a man. A request by a Man!

Working in advertising, I deal with advertisers and marketers who have their own misconstrued and twisted notions on who women are and how they behave. But, something I recently realized, everyone has their own notions and cliches in their heads about men.

Be warned, when I say men, I mean men, not little boys in college or university who are yet to deal with the problems and pressures of the real world.

I would like to set the record straight, at least about me. Following you will find the leading misconceptions people have about me, and probably, other MEN.

1. All I think and talk about are women:

This is an absolute fallacy, my life is way to complicated and has too many moving parts to dedicate a major portion of brain power and conversation about random women. I have bills to worry about, the next career move, family, friends, favours I need and favours I need to do. Maybe once or twice a month will I find the time with a good friend where we will have a brief discussion about women, but that is rarely of a sexual nature.

2. I can't be 'just friends' with a woman:

Seriously. Even some of my guy friends have accused me of this. A few of my best friends are women and I don't want to have any designs with them. Call it the male version of the friend zone, but its there. If there is a woman I don't want to be 'just friends' with I won't be friends with her.

3. When I say that I'll do something, I'll do it immediately:

Haven't you ever heard of getting the existing job done first? Or should I just drop everything and run your stupid errand?

4. That all I want is a pencil thin woman with huge knockers:

Another stupid cliche that only little boys have. Obviously I am not attracted to fat women, and before you judge men, adjust your own definition of fat, but understand the fact that all I want is a REAL woman, not a barbie doll.

5. That I am not complicated:

I too have dreams, nightmares, fears and desires just like you. I bury my insecurities under layers of protection so the world can't poke at it. I have my own hang ups and if I say 'no' to you I have reasons I don't want to share. Try analyzing that!

6. That I over think stuff because I'm stuck up:

That is possibly the dumbest thing people have confronted me with. "You think you are better than everyone else", a direct quote. I over think because I want to be sure of what is happening, I used to be a leap before looking kind of guy a decade ago, I grew up since then as that approach blew up in my face. I over think because I am unsure, I want to be sure! It is my insecurity, YES, my insecurity, I have no other choice.

7. I am constantly available to do whatever it is the fuck you want from me:

NO!

8. I am emotionally distant:

I am a diagnosed sociopath. I do have trouble dealing with complicated emotions. There, after all these years, I finally said it. If I don't feel your pain, it's because I take time processing 'empathy', that is ME... if you judge me for it, that's your problem.

9. I think about sex every 7 seconds:

Refer to point 1.

10: If you have a personal agenda, I can't tell:

Seriously, everyone who thinks that, needs a huge reality check. Ever notice how my tone changes or my interest level deteriorates. I'm being polite. Don't ever assume I don't know what you are up to. I'll be specific here, people who come to me for "advice" or "help" on "their own" projects but want me to do their job for them. It's always pretty obvious.



These are just a few things that popped to mind. As time goes along I'm sure I'll do a version 2 of this.

Until then,

Cheers,

Z